


Can You Believe In Love?

by tumble4rpdr



Category: RuPaul's Drag Race RPF
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-16
Updated: 2020-01-16
Packaged: 2021-02-27 08:08:35
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,630
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22273825
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tumble4rpdr/pseuds/tumble4rpdr
Summary: “When Brock is this happy his mind opens doors that are usually locked, doors to rooms that hide his longing for marriage and romance and love, and when those desires appear, a desire for Jose is never far behind. It seemed as though lately these thoughts were revealing themselves to him more and more and when they did, they always included a tiny olive skinned man with a frog in his throat and a sun in his chest.”
Relationships: Brooke Lynn Hytes/Vanessa Vanjie Mateo
Comments: 6
Kudos: 22





	Can You Believe In Love?

**Author's Note:**

> This idea came about because of my love of the Toes necklace that Brooke got Vanjie and thinking about what necklace Vanjie would want Brooke to wear. It then expanded from there based off of B’s recent Instagram caption and his new chain (that looks so much like something V usually wears). Once again thank you to everyone who reads and comments on this fic and I hope you all enjoy💜

Looking out over the picturesque landscape, Brock can see beauty for miles. The sky above them painted a serene sea blue and marred by not a single cloud, as if the sun wants nothing to obscure its brilliance. Enveloped in the gorgeous scenery, the delicious food, and the joyful banter of his friends and their partners, Brock feels lighter than he ever had, as effervescent as the bubbles in his glass of sparkling wine. He has Steve take a picture of him with the sun’s rays illuminating him just right, shining as bright and dazzling as his smile. He posts the image and feels his heart guiding his fingers as they dance over the keyboard and help him reveal what he is truly feeling in the moment, what he has been starting to come around to for months now. A small, always anxious part of him questions if he should be so candid but he can’t help himself. Not with the crisp wine and the elegant décor and a warm, gentle breeze that caresses his skin, all leaving him feeling boundlessly content. When Brock is this happy his mind opens doors that are usually locked, doors to rooms that hide his longing for marriage and romance and love, and when those desires appear, a desire for Jose is never far behind. It seemed as though lately these thoughts were revealing themselves to him more and more and when they did, they always included a tiny olive skinned man with a frog in his throat and a sun in his chest.

While their desserts are brought out and the group returns to their seats, Brock moves to stroke the back of his neck. His hand then travels down to feel the thick gold chain, _Jose’s_ thick gold chain, resting just above his chest as he grins to himself. He had discovered the chain when he was packing up for L.A., lying hidden on a dresser covered by boxes and makeup. Brock couldn’t place it at first but then he remembered; it had been one of the last times Jose was at his apartment before their reluctant breakup. Jose took the chain off, a chain he normally slept in, so that Brock could fasten his gifted _Toes_ necklace around him and place a kiss to where the clasp grazed the nape of his neck. Brock’s tender kiss had gradually escalated into more, leaving the chain forgotten in a surge of lust and yearning. When Brock had found it after so much time had passed, it was as if he could feel the heat from Jose’s skin still clinging to it. He imagined Jose’s heart thumping in his chest beneath the chain and fondly remembered those times when they would be laying so close that their heartbeats became one. Maybe that was what urged Brock to put it on, to have the repressed memories and the forgotten pleasures and the abandoned hope all there again, hanging lustrous and heavy around his throat. Like his treasured _Mommy_ necklace he began to wear it constantly, when he showered, when he slept, when he dreamed, as if he was doing it all with Jose’s essence once again surrounding him. That’s how the chain found itself in pictures and stories that Jose had yet to comment on and how it followed him to Mexico, so that Jose could be there with him on the vacation they never took.

The sound of his name and a boisterous laugh brings Brock back to the present, the eyes of his friends all staring at him in amusement as he realizes that the fond smile that only Jose can elicit still paints his face, accompanying a dazed expression. He chalks it up to being tired or maybe having one too many glasses of wine and excuses himself under the guise of going back to his room to lay down. Where he actually finds himself is on his way to a local jewelry store, suggested by his driver when Brock told him what he was looking for. Throughout the car ride there, Brock’s mind replays a particular fight that he and Jose had had. Back when they were never with each other for too long and choose to live in the joy that being together brought them to avoid the problems that being apart caused. Jose had been angry that Brock was so guarded about their relationship, even around people they knew they could trust. Brock reasoned his fears away with being hindered by the NDA and not wanting to risk what they had both worked so hard for. Jose cornered him and questioned what their relationship would be like once they were finally able to go public, once they were finally able to admit that they belonged to one another. Under Jose’s accusatory gaze, Brock stuttered out an unsure and uneasy _I don’t know_ leading Jose to storm out, claiming that if Brock was ashamed of him, then they shouldn’t even be together.

That’s what Brock had bought the _Toes_ necklace for, as a way to subtly but impactfully show the world that Jose was his. Jose had loved it, as he adored the idea of being possessed, of belonging to someone, and Brock thought it had been enough to help smooth things over, had potentially been enough to save them. He didn’t understand why his gift didn’t work, at least not until now. Not until seeing his friends in their relationships and thinking about his own romantic wants and needs. Thinking about what would truly make him happy, and the one person who actually did. Drunk on alcohol and his feelings and swathed in a blanket of sentimentality and possibility, Brock gets out of the now stationary car and determinedly makes his way into the store with one item in mind. He has it made for himself, for Jose, and for the promise of what could one day be. He pays for the overpriced piece and is told it’ll be ready for him in about a week, though he wishes it were sooner. Heading back out into the welcoming tropical air, Brock swears to himself that he will show it to Jose in person, as something like this is too important to do over FaceTime.

Brock sneaks away from the group and goes to pick up the piece a little over a week later, just when his vacation is coming to an end and he’s forced to re-enter the real world. Looking at it now, seeing exactly what he requested staring back at him, the more of a mistake it feels like. On the flight home, the box seems to burn a hole in his pocket but Brock leaves it there and lets it smolder as new thoughts begin to race through his head. As his vacation fog lifts, Brock starts to realize the gravity of what he did and the uncertainty surrounding it. He begins to think he was too presumptuous and that he’s getting far too ahead of himself. He questions if Jose would even want something like this anymore, or if Jose would even still want him. Brock’s doubts and insecurities follow him around for the next few weeks, like a flu bug he can’t seem to get over. Even Steve, who went back home to Chicago after their trip, can tell just from the sound of his voice during work calls that Brock seems to be more anxious than usual. In the hope of _getting fun vacation Brock back_ as Steve jokingly put it, he surprises him with VIP tickets to RuPaul’s Drag Race LIVE!, letting him know that his flight to Vegas, or as Brock is thinking of it his flight to Jose, is only a few days away.

Seeing his friends and fellow queens perform as part of an elaborate production on the Vegas Strip fills Brock with a sense of pride and awe. Watching Vanjie perform, however, is its own experience entirely. As her name lights up on screen, Brock’s breath catches and his pulse begins to race, as if he’s the one who’s about to perform. Her movements, while rehearsed and precise, seem to carry her essence with them, as if no one else could perform this but her. Like a magnet, she draws the attention of each and every audience member towards her and only her, pulling their love and excitement along with it. Her power and allure are overwhelming and Brock remains absolutely captivated until Steve pulls him backstage once the show ends.

They warmly greet the queens, who have now de-dragged, and congratulate them on a fantastic show. Brock manages to keep his cool, distracted by talking and laughing and celebrating with his friends. It is only once he eyes Vanjie, now Jose, up close that the butterflies in his stomach come out of their cocoons and his hand trembles as he feels for the box now stabbing its way through his front pocket.

“Didn’t expect to catch you here boo,” Jose says with a smirk as he throws his arm around Brock’s waist and pulls him in for a side hug, leaning his cheek against Brock’s chest. “Been wondering when I was ever gonna see yo ass again.”

“Hope I didn’t make you wait too long,” Brock replies as he looks down at Jose and smiles as he wraps his arm around his shoulder. Despite his apprehension, getting to hold Jose like this and Jose looking at him with a sparkle in his eyes transports Brock back to that gorgeous restaurant in Mexico, to a time when he was swept up in feelings of happiness and love that always seem to find their way back to the man in his arms. Brock instinctively brings Jose closer and places a light kiss to his head, making Jose pull back slightly with an expression of appreciation and surprise.

“You wanna get outta here?” Jose asks hopefully.

Brock nods emphatically as Jose takes his hand to lead him out of the backstage area, Brock quickly looking around for Steve who’s already watching them with a knowing look.

They arrive at the temporary apartment the show provided for Jose. Unlike his L.A. apartment, or what Brock remembers of it, this place is bare and shows few signs of the vibrant man he knows. The emptiness of the place also further emphasizes how it really is just the two of them in this moment, making Brock suddenly feel slightly awkward over having all of Jose’s attention on him for the first time in months. Brock takes a seat on the couch while Jose goes to the kitchen to get them something to drink.

“You like being a thief bitch?” Jose playfully calls from the other room.

“What do you mean?” Brock questions as Jose returns to the living room with two bottles of water and joins Brock on the couch.

“Been looking for that chain for forever and all this time you was holding it hostage. Tell me something, what yo white ass need with a gold chain?” Jose asks with a smirk as he nudges Brock’s shoulder with his own.

“I was waiting for you to ask me about it,” Brock replies, more honestly than he initially intended as his thumb pulls on the chain.

“I been meaning to ask you ‘bout a lotta things,” Jose begins as he turns to face Brock. “You mean what you saying in your little Gram subtitle?”

“Which one?” Brock asks timidly even though he has a good idea which caption Jose’s talking about.

“That pic of you in Mexico and what you put underneath. You really believing all that?” Jose inquires again, sounding a little more serious this time.

“Well maybe not entirely,” Brock answers and he can see Jose’s face fall ever so slightly. “I know I probably won’t die completely alone. I mean, Henry and Apollo might be their too, depending on when I meet my demise,” Brock finishes awkwardly joking.

“You still one weird ass mother fucker ain’t you Toes?” Jose says with disbelief and delight, a fond smile returning to his face. “And that stuff ‘bout dreaming up your fairy tail wedding and ‘bout finally being ready for your Prince Charming?”

“I don’t know if I said all that,” Brock slyly replies, a teasing grin on his face.

“Tomato, potato bitch, it don’t make no difference. I just-” Jose’s voice got softer and less playful. “You really out there believing in love now or was you just playing with some dry ass Canadian humor and letting me get my hopes up?”

Brock moves his hand from his lap to place it on top of Jose’s and squeezes.

“I meant it, I promise,” Brock replies earnestly as Jose looks away embarrassed but relieved. “I don’t know what it was but that trip made me rethink things. Or maybe I’d been feeling that way for a while and something about being there reminded me of what it was like to be in love, and to be with you.”

Jose lets out a soft gasp as Brock moves his hand off his and goes to dig in his front pocket feeling for the velvet box. “I was so caught up that I even had this made,” Brock explains, his throat suddenly feeling dry.

“I know your freedom hungry ass ain’t giving me no ring,” Jose attempts to reason though Brock sees his eyes go wide. “‘Sides, the box too big.”

“Well, it’s not a ring, it’s, um, it’s actually for me but also for you,” Brock starts with a deep breath. “You know how much I think about you, even after the breakup and everything, and after your FaceTime call and us starting to talk more again and then finding your chain and thinking about us and what happened and-“

“Cut to the chase Mary,” Jose interrupts still with a small grin.

“I finally get what you were looking for throughout our relationship and after too and I’m sorry, for both our sakes, that it’s taken me so long to get here.”

Jose looks at Brock expectantly, mouth now slightly agape.

“And this was kind of spur of the moment and I’m not trying to force you into anything and I’m not saying this is what I want but maybe it is and I don’t even know how you feel about everything anymore but-“ Brock opens the box, Jose only seeing a faint shimmer before Brock moves to hang the delicate chain around his neck. He adjusts it so it sits perfectly and clearly between his beloved _Mommy_ necklace and what was once Jose’s chain, then puts his arms down allowing Jose to get a good look. It’s gold like the others, in a familiar though slightly larger and bolder script font. Jose has to move closer to Brock, their faces now inches apart, and takes the necklace in his hand; he needs to get a good look so he can really believe what he’s seeing. Around Brock’s neck on full view sits a necklace that reads _Jose’s Husband_. Jose gently releases the necklace from his grasp and looks at Brock, whose eyes are now closed as if fearful of Jose’s reaction.

“That what you really want?” Jose asks quietly yet hopefully.

“I think it is,” Brock softly confirms. “But most of all I just know that I want to be with you.”

At that Jose pulls him into a heated kiss which Brock eagerly reciprocates.

“So,” Jose starts with a delighted grin on his face, still nose to nose with Brock after separating their lips. “How you feel about dying alone, together?”

“I’d like that,” Brock answers giving Jose a sweet peck. “Though why don’t we start with a date first?”


End file.
